I keep telling myself that being beautiful is not important. It doesn't determine who you are or the impact that you make.

I am not pretty. I am not beautiful. Not everyone *has* to be so.

And yet, I see my co workers and I see other girls, and the 7th grade self, the awkward, gawky, extremely unsure of her body self still asks - why can't that be me?

Chocolate two layer cake with a raspberry filling. Vanilla butter cream frosting. Chopped walnuts on the sides.

It was a good cake. In fact, there still some left.

Happy easter, y'all!

I am very lucky in being surrounded by wonderful men. Strong, good, upstanding men.

Of course, none of them are available, but they are all great examples of what lies in the great beyond.

Beware, here be dragons...

and I have nothing to wear.

Eeeek!

Poll #1324524 Things Liz should already have enough courage to do
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 1

Should Liz tell Engineer Boy how she feels about him despite their being friends for a few years and his intention to move out of the area in a few months, perhaps?

Please remember to gift the kitten in your life.

It burns like blazing fire,
like a mighty flame
the very flame of the Lord...

and I?

I desire
like a forest fire.

I got 100% on the Beastie Boys' "Sabotage" on Medium.

Also, my voice was shot after an hour and some.


Woo.

We were walking along a lovely home, high above the city. It was clean and sparkling and the sort of thing that isn't really real. Not really. It had huge windows and the light was tinged blue. We had to go, there was a meeting soon. I didn't know how we were going to get there. He said to get on the chair. It was smooth and black leather and it looked a little like a doctor's chair. He stood above me, held me very tightly, and we whirred. In a moment, after I'd gotten my breath back, we were in another part of the city, waiting for the meeting to start.

How strange, to travel that way.

And then the meeting was over and we went back to the house in the same way. Except this time he wouldn't let me go. And I didn't fight it.

My Superman was icy, chilling, and cutting. I didn't want to wake up.

I saw this boy I liked today and I went up to him and said Hi. He looked almost sad to see me.

I immediately left.

the end.

but I am.


And I'm really happy that Obama won. Not just as in, oh, that's good, but no, really happy. A lot of other people don't feel moved by him and my dad says he's gonna get assassinated and we're just gonna end up with some old white guy in the presidency. Not me. I hope he stays there, I hope he does what he says he's going to do. I hope he really gives us a positive change.

So, yay.

But!

Prop 8 had an 8% "Yes" lead right now with 64% of the state in. That's worrisome. I am a Catholic, and I definitely stick to my guns where my faith is concerned, but I really wanted this proposition to be defeated. It is ignorant, prejudiced, and wrong. I prompted everyone I knew to vote No and my brother went so far as to dispose of a car load of "Yes to 8" signs.

California, what the fuck?

We'll see how it pans out in the morning.

PS - My broke ass went back to Starbucks (albeit at a different location) and I'll probably start Monday. All morning shifts, all lobby. I'm kind of really excited about it.

I have no idea why, but I find this picture of Tim Curry so super sexy! I can't stop looking at it.

teh hott!

Yeah, I don't know what's wrong with me either.

He's moved there and will be starting a new job this week. I feel weird, not having him around. His stuff is mostly gone. He didn't take the guitar, which is good, but he took a bunch of movies, his hats, his fancy shoes, a couple of liquor bottles, some books.

What things our lives are made of...

I know I'll see him for my birthday, and that he's only a plane ride away, and that he's not gone forever, but I miss him all the same.

So I was looking through my iTunes library and to my surprise found the following tracks that I had no idea I "owned":

- "I'm Waiting for the Man" by David Bowie
- "Bonjour" from the Beauty and the Beast soundtrack
- "Funeral" (an album I guess?) from The Arcade Fire as well as their self titled album
- Some random Bobby Brown (wtf?)


Also, I'd totally forgotten I'd subscribed to the This American Life podcast so I have a backlog of that. Hurr hurr.

On that note, I was sorta half listening to a show yesterday called something like "Tommy Hilfiger presents American Icons" or something and it was basically this dude and Bar R-something or other (she's a model) going around to different "iconic" American places where style has come from. Yeah, I don't know. Anyhow, the tone of the whole thing was very Ira Glass and I had to change it after a half hour coz I was over it. Recently I've gotten very annoyed by the whole Manhattan world view phenomenon. Yeah, okay, so not everyone is cosmopolitan as all fuck, but godDAMN do you have to be so pretentious? It comes off as not genuine. Yeah, I have no vocabulary anymore.

PS: Lolita is on my brain constantly, so much so that while watching someone sing about a Rosebud yesterday I was all - eww, pedophile - but really it was just a coming of age song.

so suggest something and I'll draw.

Anything.

Those of you that have known me a fairly long amount of time know of my love for Nothing Nice to Say. In fact, it was pretty much my obsession for about a year. I met a bunch of lovely internet friends through that comic and I also met my first boyfriend through our mutual love of the comic.

It's funny, but that stage of my life seems so remote and so far away that I can only remember glimpses. I made a t-shirt for NN2S creator Mitch Clem that said "Jesus was a punk" and I spent many late night hours reading archives and posting on the forum. In fact, my first bit of fan art was for that site. I made avatars for my "friends" on the forums and still talk to a select few from those times.

Wow, all that passion and I was only in high school...

Anyhow, I am so happy to hear that Dark Horse will be releasing the complete NN2S in print on October 15th. Weee! When Mitch announced that he was ending NN2S I immediately went through the whole of the archives and saved every single comic. EVERY.SINGLE.COMIC.

Let that sink in...

Anyway, I started formatting a booklet of the comics on PageMaker but got sad halfway through and eventually abandoned the endeavor.

I'm glad someone finally decided to put the comic in print. I feel as though I know how much work and labor and tears and horrible nights went into that comic, mostly because Mitch talked of it at length on the blogs accompanying the comics. I can't wait for the collection to come out.

**giggle**

For Megan.

Um, so. Yes.

Last night I watched the season premiere of Mad Men. It wasn't what I expected. 


I'm very excited for the next episode though and hope to glimpse more of Peggy's home life. I'm curious as to what happened with her during her "holiday."

In other news, site directing is kicking my ass. Seriously. I have been working ten to twelve hour days all last week and today it looks like this week is going to be similar. I'm up for it, though, and it has given me renewed motivation to once again start pestering my dad for my car. I need to practice if I'm ever not going to crash into stationary objects. Driving lessons are planned, but I think I won't be able to start for another week because of my schedule. 

Um, oh! So I met the other new site director and he's from Chicago. Crazy! He relocated all the way from there for this job so I guess we should all help him get established and such. I hope he's up for hanging out, since I don't really get along with the other site directors. 
 
I went by my old Starbucks and saw Timmy there. God, he looks good. And I didn't even have my make up on. 

Ah well,